10. You consider selling the piece of chewing gum you found on your shoe.
9. You apply for a new loan & give your paypal address as your only bank account.
8. You've taken down the degree & awards in your office to be replaced by self made power seller print-outs.
7. You save all your toe-nail clippings in a jar, hoping that one day they may be worth a small fortune.
6. You wear the same underwear for a week, waiting for your chance to outbid "gstring-guru" on a pair of used designer briefs.
5. You spend several hours a day trying to burn the face of Mary onto pieces of French Toast.
4. You've marked 87 separate - 2 inch sections on your body that can be sold as advertising space to the highest bidder.
3. You've lost so much sleep due to bidding wars that you are selected as Christian Bale's replacement in The Machinist II.
2. you have to see a therapist because the negative feedback you got is killing your self esteem. 1. You go to the county registrar & change your legal name to your eBay User ID.
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